Right now I'm in a three week long slump. I know, I know...for shame! I don't want to talk about it.
In all actuality, I really want to get out of this slump, but my mood just isn't letting me.
See, I am in a good mood overall right now because I'm actually owning the world right now. I moved out of my old dorm room where I was getting bullied and into a single studio-like dorm room that is absolutely rocking my world. I am slowly unpacking because, well, I have a social life and an internship and two on-campus jobs and classes and, unfortunately, pesky homework assignments that get in the way. Also a huge desire for sleep because I haven't gotten much in the past three months in all actuality due to me drowning in negative emotions. But, dang it, I am Queen of the Universe right now because I'm so proud of this step forward in life that I took and how it's already affecting me positively.
|I will forever love this music video.|
You know it's bad when you get a text from your Dad saying "it's nice to see you smiling again" because that really put things into perspective for me. I've only been in this room for 48 hours, but I already feel like Lili again.
However, I'm still feeling the remnants of that old dorm room and the negative feelings that took over from it because those negative feelings did temporarily alter my behavior and my outlook on certain things. In the time that I was in that room I did have a lot of free time. I could read, but instead I sat on my laptop doing absolutely nothing with my headphones in just so that I would not be addressed because a snide remark was almost guaranteed to follow. That uncertainty to just relax is still plaguing me.
I feel awkward chilling in my new dorm just watching TV because that's not something I'm used to anymore. And, well, reading isn't something I'm used to right now either. I carry a book with me everywhere and then I find myself putting it down in favor of...nothing.
But I am just not in the mood to be emotionally eviscerated by beautifully written words that blow my mind. GUYS! THIS IS SOMETHING I LOVE! I LOVE BEING EMOTIONALLY EVISCERATED BY BEAUTIFUL WORDS WRITTEN BY THE BEST STORYTELLERS EVER. See Jellicoe Road if you need to understand what I am saying.
It doesn't help that I have a midterm on Monday. But that's just part of college.
And by that I mean the part of college that should never ever exist and should be eliminated in the immediate future. Or the present. That works, too.
So, let's get down to business. I need to get out of this funk. I need my reading habits to finally catch up to the happiness that I am experiencing. I need a puppies and kittens and unicorns flying through the air riding rainbows and eating flowers book. Find me the fluffiness to end all fluffiness. All suggestions are welcome, necessary, and much appreciated. I need your go-to get-out-of-funk books because I've used mine so much they've been slightly exhausted at this point. You will be repaid with my infinite graciousness and my blog being active once again.
And, of course, the knowledge that you totally helped a fellow blogger out when she needs it most.
|Trust me on this one, I am eagerly anticipating the below comments 'cause this sister needs some helping out.|